mama musing // Fall must-haves

Deep into the 10×10 Fall challenge and while I have more to come on that, it’s been something I have been wanting to try. I am guilty of being a total consumer, and really trying to be a fiscally responsible adult (yuck) has made me look at making conscious choices about what purchases I make.

Combined with trying to plan and make smarter purchases, I am also trying to be smarter about supporting smaller businesses, ethically sound companies that reflect my values.

That being said, here is my limited Fall/Winter must-haves…which I will probably only end up having a few of these pieces, but that’s part of the fun!

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one :: Rawson Vintage Overdye Twill Pants

two :: Madewell Corduroy Belted Jumpsuit

three :: Madewell Bonded Sherpa Cocoon Jacket

four :: General Store Mari Giuducelli Classic Boot

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one :: DÔEN Annie Top

two :: FOUND Clary Balm

three :: Rawrson Vintage Almond Overdye Chore Jacket

four :: General Store No 6 Shearling Clog

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mama musing // mental health

Through my life anxiety has always been a constant, it wasn’t until my 30s that I realized that it was something as big as it was. For the past 20 years I have let anxiety creep into, and affect my life.

Anxiety is no joke, depression and anger can get triggered when you start to think, “hey, what’s wrong with me?! Why can’t I just be normal?” I have always wanted to share this, almost as a disclaimer for anyone who has known me, but always hesitated at being that vulnerable. But after this week, I didn’t feel right not putting what has been so hard for me into words.

Really I want to start by saying I am sharing my story, not diagnosing, suggesting treatments, but just sharing how I finally feel. In my 30s I am figuring out my anxiety. I wanted to share it as a part of my journey, because with anxiety and depression, your head can be a terrifying place. I have found that writing out my thoughts and emotions helps me to understand them, and as my doctor suggests, recognize what triggers my anxiety, recognize what those emotions feel like so I can work through them, instead of being paralyzed by them.

My anxiety has ruled my life for so long, and it has not been until I had my daughter that I really was able to give my greatest demon a name. I also was diagnosed with a MTHFR gene mutation shortly before my pregnancy that, among one of its many talents, can cause a feeling of anxiety and depression.

My anxiety hindered my ability to enjoy social settings, but the worst of it was high school/college and after the birth of my daughter.

When I was in high school I had such a debilitating loneliness, and anxiety of fitting in that I almost hid from social settings. It lead to feelings of inadequacy about my appearance, which formed into a need to hyper-control food, that toed the line of a disorder. It’s the anxiety that ruled my first relationship that stretched the end of high school and through all my years of college. It lived in my friendships.

It was the anxiety that lead me to end that relationship because I was sure that the loneliness that came from my anxiety something I was lacking. I was also going through some health issues that heightened that anxiety. I was to the point that I would count the minutes at a restaurant, sweating, praying, that I made it to the end of a meal without being ill. I was scared to be anywhere but my house.

Even recounting these times, brings me flashbacks of how incredibly overwhelming those feeling were. Wondering if I could really go on. My mid-twenties were incredibly fun, but full of sadness. I blamed my anxiety on my long relationship, but I know now I was trying to blame it on something other than myself, I wasn’t ready to admit it was me. I was scared. I ran away to Philly, of course acting as though it was a big strong decision, I thought I could will my anxiety away.

Some good came of this, I got to see that I could survive out of my comfort zone. I developed a confidence I was missing, but once the new and shiny wore off, my anxiety was still there. Feeling lonely, anxious and self-doubt. In this time I got married and lead me to my most recent occasion where my anxiety nearly flattened me, the birth of my daughter.

I had a pretty easy pregnancy, with the exception of my 1st trimester which was incredibly emotional. I was taking a folic acid supplement, on recommendation from my doctor, and suffering wild fits of severe sadness and anxiety. Mix these feelings with a hard time at work and I was a mess. I soon found out folic acid was one of those MTHFR triggers of anxiety. I quickly stopped taking my supplement, and aside from the normal new mom jitters I felt good. It was the Postpartum Anxiety that I was not prepared for.

I thought my anxiety was something I had grown out of, but lack of sleep and losing the ownership of my body to a small human was crippling. I found myself scheduling mommy and me yogas and panicking outside the class refusing to go in. I would be so tired and sure that I was failing as a mother that I would look at my daughter and apologize for my weakness.

Through all these years, through all these experiences I said nothing. I wasn’t until the fog of the fourth trimester lifted, that I began to recognize what I was struggling and what had been there all along.

I finally opened up to my husband, explained the what I had been feeling. I am still not sure I have told anyone the worst of it, but I am still getting there. He has helped me see that what I am experiencing is not just a phase, or that I am just off, that there is something I can’t control that is affecting my life.

I have found that through seeing my daughter grow up, and seeing her intense love for me, that I want to be proactive about taking care of my mental health. I have found in motherhood, that time goes so fast and this little life I am helping shape is a sponge of emotions around her.

I am in a more open and honest relationship with my doctor, after a 4 hour anxiety attack I knew I needed professional help. I have also found that not being afraid to verbalize my anxiety and share with those around me has helped calm my mind during attacks. Seeing and hearing that I am not alone, has been amazing. Surprisingly social media has brought me to a world of women whose openness and honesty with their own struggles has helped me feel less alone.

I am learning to manage, I am lucky that through all of this I had people who loved and supported me. I am lucky that there was always someone there. I am sad to think that there are people who can’t find their way out, and it’s heartbreaking to hear suicide is their only means to end their pain.

I guess through all of this ramblingI want to say that if you feel this way your are not alone. I also do not want to hide that in these times there were great moments of happiness and love, that’s the scary part of anxiety.

I am feeling more prepared to move forward and find balance. If you are unable to find that, or still feel like there is too much darkness, please reach out to someone. The National Suicide Hotline is there 1-800-273-8255.

why we love // urb apothecary

Welcome to the first “why we love” series where I talk about brands we carry in the shop, like URB apothecary, or brands we love and why!

Started in 2013 by Leyna Allred, URB apothecary was born out of a desire to bring the natural healing properties of plants to beauty rituals. Each product is made with the highest quality organic, fair-trade and ethical ingredients in California.

I first fell in love with Leyna’s product after purchasing her Lip & Cheek Tint from a small boutique in Philadelphia, Moon + Arrow, and quickly began my love affair with this brand. That love was cemented when after desperately trying various creams for my daughter’s diaper rash, URB’s Butt Balm soothed it within one use!

When I decided to expand our assortment at Doe + Fawn, I knew I wanted to share my love of natural, and organic, self-care products. This is something I have become incredibly passionate about, and Leyna takes that one-step forward by adding her eco-consciousness to packaging and shipping.

Here are my favorite products from her shop, which I highly recommend. To learn more about Leyna and her mission to create a plant-based alternative to your beauty cabinet, check our her shop.

Slumber Serum $ 22

This serum is chalk full of herbs and essential oils, to help bring a calmness to you mind, and your skin, while easing the mind to a relaxing slumber.

The blend of calendula, lavender, chamomile, and scents like sandalwood and lavender, make is a product you can use for mental break during a stressful day.

Mama Gift Set $ 32

This gift sets contains both the belly butter and butt balm, a must for any expectant, or new, mom.

The butt balm is the perfect heal-all for sensitive tushies since it’s non-toxic and all natural. Soothing irritated, cracked, or dry skin.

Belly Butter is the perfect drink of anti-oxidant oils for tight and stretched skin that many experience with growing and stretching bellies.

Sun Worshipper Serum $ 26

This serum is one I recommend to E-V-E-R-Y-O-N-E! I like to pair this with my jade facial roller, when I really need an extra jolt of nutrients to my skin. Don’t let the name fool you, this is made for every season and every face. The repairing properties just make it even more magical for those of us who sometimes chase that summer glow!

Lip/Cheek Tint $12

The old faithful. This subtle tint is the key to that effortless no-make up look. Moisturizing while it works, it can be purchased in a vegan option or waste-free.

| doe & fawn | shop vibes

It’s a new year (yay!) and as always when we start a new year, I am always filled with in ambitions, and intentions. See previous post for more on this…

The shop became a huge focus of 2017, and I am thrilled to keep it moving into the new year. Of course, I am always looking to see how I can build my business creatively, and in result, challenge myself.

Here’s what’s getting those creative juices flowing for 2018:

New Years // New Intentions

Welcoming 2018, and looking back at 2017, with appreciation for all we accomplished while looking forward to all we hope to accomplish in 2018.

Since it’s been about a year, wowza, since our last post I thought I would introduce you, or re-reintroduce for those who know us, to Doe + Fawn Goods.

I know what you are thinking, umm who is this super photogenic family?! We are the team that makes up Doe + Fawn Goods. Mom heads up creative direction, babe handles final buying decisions, and Dad mans the fort whenever you see us slinging quality vintage Levis and yummy natural beauty products.

Founded in 2015 by a mom with an affinity for vintage denim, and a love of treasure hunting for her and her little babe. In those two years we have opened up shop, headed to Ohio, popped-up shop in both Cincinnati and Cleveland, and started carrying small batch apothecary.

The shop has grown and transformed over the last two years, and while we are still in our infancy, we have truly found our “voice” and are building up to a magical 2018. Continuing to bring a curated collection of the “the perfect pair” of vintage jeans for mom and babe, beautiful leather bags, magical accessories, and good-for-you apothecary goods, we are expanding into vintage fine jewelry and looking to make more in-person appearances because meeting you all has been the best part of 2017!

Thank you for all your support, and for you newbies…thanks for stopping by! Stay awhile, we love having you!!

XoXo

Doe + Fawn Goods

| mama musing // shopping list |

Anyone else have a mountain of wishlists scattered around the inter-webs? I love shopping and wanted to share my favorite places.

For those of you who have followed along with Doe and Fawn you know I love a good little shop that supports lovely women. I have compiled a shopping list featuring some beautiful shops and brands. 

I would love to grow this list, where are your favorite places to shop?

Local Love // Columbus


Splendor Revival

 

Rowe 


Jewelweed


Under Aurora

Local Love // Philadelphia 


Moon and Arrow

 

Meadowsweet Merchantile 


 Vagabond Boutique 

Mama Owned //


Found Company


Rudy Jude Co


Commune Folk 


Apples and Forts


Bohème Goods

I Feel Pretty 

I have always been a firm believer that your skin is something that is the base to any good style. Over the past few years I have strived to move to a more natural and more importantly cruelty-free skin routine.

 

Glossier

 

Urb Apothecary

Cool Mama //

For those of us whose mom uniform has no leggings in sight, at least outside of the house. 

 

Christy Dawn

 

Dôen


Worn Collective

Right now they are just for little ones but they have a line for mamas on the way and I can only imagine! 

 

The Bee and The Fox 

| doe & fawn // may lookbook |

I am extremely excited to be releasing Doe + Fawn’s FIRST EVER lookbook!! While I hope this is the start of something bigger and better to come, I am extremely proud to be sharing it with everyone. This little shop has become my passion, my therapy, really my hope to one day follow my dreams full-time. When I began this store almost a year ago, I was full of so much doubt, but also began to find my courage to do the thing I have always wanted. While I have big ideas in-store for this next year at Doe + Fawn I am excited about celebrating what we have accomplished, where we are going, and really the amazing feeling to be on the path we are on.

Be sure to check out the shop on May 1st for our May New Arrivals and a little sale to celebrate a husband and wife creative collaboration while toting around a bossy toddler.

 

Black Cropped Levi’s $40
silk blouse $40
Cotton Tank $35
Levi’s 550’s $45
Straw Purse $25
Cotton Tank $35
Sake Set $25
Wideleg Linen Pants $35
Striped Textured Blouse $30
Mid-Century Wood Tray $30
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Black Cropped Levi’s $40

 

Stripe Cotton Blouse $35
Leather Shoulder Bag $45
Silk Blouse $40
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White Linen Maxi $45
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Woven Basket $15

 

 

Striped Cotton Shirt $35

 

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White Linen Maxi $45
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Woven Crossbody Bag $25

 

| around here // yellow springs |

Over the weekend we ventured to Yellow Springs, a little town with a lot of personality! I used to visit this town for lunch and a hike all through high school and I could not wait to show my little family. The temps quickly were on the rise and once it hit 90 we were spent. 

The funniest part of our day-tripping was when Harper was stopped to have her outfit photographed, she handled it like such a cool customer. I got wear my new favorite caftan, basically my summer staple, from Third Street Habit and is Emerson Fry. I lusted after this baby for a solid three years, and now she is mine!

| around here // inside the makeup bag |

For those who may not know I have always been fascinated with the natural approach to beauty. With the beginning of my pregnancy with Harper I was hyper aware of what I was putting on my largest organ, my skin, and how it was made.

While I admit I still have a way to go, I am happy to see the progress I had made to healthier ingredients and cruelty-free makings. As a mom, I have to admit time keeps me from getting makeup tutorial intense but this fuss free line-up has been great.


| care |

I have not found a face wash I love yet, suggestions welcome, but I am feeling pretty amazing about how I have been caring for my skin.

Biologique Recherche Lotion P50 Original “1970”

This stuff is gold. I was introduced to it during a facial and fell in love. It basically erases time and gives you magic skin.

Kiehls Midnight Recovery Concentrate

My cure for lack of a nights sleep. Put a few drops on when I know sleep will be minimal, toddlers right?

Mario Badescu Seaweed Night Cream

When I really need that extra burst of moisture at night.

Mario Badescu Glycolic Eye Cream 

Cheap and effective.

Glossier Super Bounce 

I have recently discovered this as my morning makeup prep, and I regret everyday that I did not have this.

| makeup |

Similar to the face wash I am still not in love with my color corrector. I am currently using Lush’s Color Corrector and just not sure it’s the best, suggestions?


Glossier Cloud Paint

The greatest cheek tint for an easy fuss free look.

Glossier Boy Brow 

Their #1 seller and totally see why. I have a naturally curly brow and this has been great on multiple levels.

URB Apothecary Highlighting Serum

Because the older I get the more tricks are important. 

URB Apothecary Lips and Cheek Tint 

The only color I carry everyday, and a multi-tasked? A mom win.

Pacifica Stellar Gaze Mascara

After a few disasters I found a mineral mascara I love. Doesn’t run and washes off. Natural look, really all I need.

RMS Beauty “Un” Powder

Minimalist packaging and an uncaked look. 

| scent |


Tokyo Milk Excess

The only scent I have worn in…YEARS. I want to add an alternate but this is just too good.

What’s you beauty go to?